Tuesday, June 06, 2006
go with god...you plonker...
OK…check this moron out.
I always get a laugh out of these stories; there are usually three or four of them scattered throughout the world press in any given year; some deranged God-fondler with a Daniel-complex enters the proverbial lion’s den, only to be given a disappointingly-fatal religious re-education and get his head gnawed off.
Inevitably it’s the same sort of knucklehead each time. A middle-aged male, German or South African, wearing robes and sandals, armed with nothing but a copy of The Bible and a strong, personal belief that his God will somehow protect him from the grisly fate otherwise assured by the large signs placed around the wild animal enclosures in all metropolitan zoos. The mortal conclusion, although colourfully entertaining for the kiddies, is often slow and painful for the adventurous believer and invariably comes shortly after his uttering the line ‘Yeah though I walk through the shadow of the Valley of Death, I shall fear no…’
Sometimes the choice of beast varies; lions seem to be the favourite carnivore for the majority of these Messianic nutbags, however I’ve read of incidents involving tigers, leopards, bears, crocodiles, pythons, gorillas and even honey bees.
One constant however seems to be that when the rescuers finally manage to drag the half-eaten/mangled/stung carcass from the arena, the bible found with the remains of the victim is always opened to Revelations, which appears these days to have become The Book of Loons; an all-purpose instruction manual for the suicidal zealot.
My question is: why try and save these idiots at all ??
They should be disqualified from taking any further part in the evolutionary process, according to Darwin’s principles, as surely as the deluded gonzo that severs his own penis in a fit of matrimonial rage…