Sunday, February 10, 2008

teachers pet...

OK, so for the past few weeks I’ve been very busy with Writer School.
Writer School blows very large goats (see how my use of metaphors has improved?).
It’s way too Zen-like for my taste; lots of meditating, closing of the eyes, exploring one’s surroundings with all five newly-electrified senses then frantically scribbling down an unedited stream of consciousness. Last week I had my eyes open and was staring at some chick’s bongos while she was zenning-out, so when the tutor yelled ‘OK, now write what you’re thinking’…I wrote ‘Bongos…want.’
No Pulitzer for me.
Oh…and the best bit. After each writing exercise, we all get to critique each other’s pieces…but it’s POSITIVE feedback only. Can you imagine how much I’m into that?
‘Oh Brenda, I just loved the way you used the ‘bricks of detail’ technique to describe Jenny’s fascinating personal journey of discovery during her Kontiki tour of Goa…’
‘And Rita, Cassie, Miriam, Delia and Patricia, although on the surface your pieces all seemed to be identical journals of lost love, I found that each of you had approached this riveting topic from a wonderfully unique perspective…’
At least I would have done if I hadn’t fallen asleep during the first paragraph.
Did I mention I was one of just two guys in a class of twelve?
That’s right…ten chicks…seven of whom when asked ‘So, why are you taking the Unlocking Creativity course?’ answered ‘I want to unlock my creativity.’
Doh!!!
So, who wants to see what I’ve written…

20 comments:

Mel said...

Nah, I'll pass on that thanks fingers.




just jokes. go on then, ya big plonker.

fingers said...

OK, that's one vote for yes.
From some strange chick I've never heard of...

unique_stephen said...

Put me down as a mostly yes.

fingers said...

Cool.
That's one stranger and a pervert so far...

travistee said...

I think Mel might be Betty.... so don't get all insulting yet.

I'm a yes. What are you going to call me?

Madam Z said...

Okay, I'm stranger than a pervert and I am willing to see what you've written...

Bo Bo said...

Only if it’s a journal of ones lost love.

fingers said...

So, that's one unmasked stranger, a pervert, an informer, one honest woman and a literary self-mutilator...

Josh said...

So let me guess, your story starts something like this;

An unmasked stranger, a pervert, an informer, one honest woman and a literary self-mutilator walk into a bar.....

So did you do speed dating before the writing course or is that the next option if the chicks won't let you unleash your creativity on them?

fingers said...

Josh: Mate, I'll post one of the exercises we did last week, along with some of the critical remarks made by a couple of the chicks. They make me want to cut my fucken head off in despair...

EmmaK said...

Even if the course is a pile of crap, look on the bright side, all those girls. Are any of them fit and would you want any of them to unlock your boxers?

nudeman40 said...

Do the chicks like boats? You allways become more intuned with nature and your surrondings when nude on a boat..Think you can sell that at the next class?? Oh ya we need pics...

Kaisa said...

Me me me!!! Please!

Mel said...

mel (taking off mask) screams,


"Tis me fingers!" Retired 'Betty'...just popping by. Can't seem to stay away from my favorites.

fingers said...

Emmak: I just visited your blog. Wow, you're a clever little thing. Noticed you'd written a manuscript too but I didn't have time to read it. I will though. Can I steal large chunks of it and submit it to Writer School to get out of my homework this week.

nm40: Your blog is nice too. Concise.

kaisa: Sadly, I couldn't get into your main blog...even sadder, I'm allergic to spinach.

mel: Nope, still doesn't ring any bells. Give me another hint...

Kelly said...

no

Kelly said...

damn... i'm too late.

just call me the procrastinating window licker in the back

Mel said...

boobs? very large boobs? writes things like 'here here' and uses crap grammer.

Kitty said...

take your fucken boat to class fingers!

you haven't revealed what the other guy is like?

another boat weilding creep from Cunt Point?

Ms Smack said...

Totally digging the stories.